Thursday, September 15, 2011

"The Living Daylights" - John Glen


ABOVE: "My name is Cellov! 'Cellov Agurl'! No? Better than Kara Milovy!"

Remember "The Living Daylights"? The Bond movie in which 007 goes to Afghanistan to basically team up with a young Osama Bin Laden and help him in his struggle for democracy? The one with the A-Ha song? It's hard to tell which is the biggest miscalculation there.



No, wait, the biggest miscalculation is Maryam D'Abo as Kara Milovy, a defecting cello player. They might as well have made her a band nerd allergic to (but in love with) her cat. D'Abo is a pretty woman, sure, but she's the least va-vooomy Bond girl of all time. Combine no va-voom with no acting skills, and half of "The Living Daylights" sucks. Timothy Dalton, though? Underrated. Pierce Brosnan underrated. Do we have our Bond hierarchies straight, ladies and gentlemen?

1- Sean Connery




THEN

2- Pierce Brosnan
3-Timothy Dalton
4-Roger Moore
5-George Lazenby.

I'm sorry, but Daniel Craig is not James Bond. James Bond CARES that it's shaken, not stirred. Maybe after a third movie I'll change my mind.


ABOVE: "James! I want to thank you and the West for providing us with weapons and military training for our struggle against Communism! I promise this will have no further repercussions. Say, Bond, I hear there's some cool towers in New York, any way I can take a look at some structural maps?"

Too soon?!?


3 comments:

Hansel Castro said...

Old people can freely feel like switching Brosnan and Moore in their hierarchy. I don't even mind Moore, but he did get the shittiest stretch of Bond movies.

Ian said...

Fair point about Craig, but his Casino Royale is still the best Bond movie by a fair margin.

Hansel Castro said...

Re:Ian
Yeah, it's not the movies, the movies are awesome. It's HIM. He's just NOT the character. He's ANOTHER cool character, just not James Bond.

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